When Letting Go Means Finding Joy

(in)courage | 3/19/2019 | Staff
ArceusArceus (Posted by) Level 3
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I’ve been madly cleaning out my closet this week. The Marie Kondo bug has hit hard, and I’ve really taken to heart her challenge to get rid of anything that doesn’t “spark joy.” I’m not usually the type of person to whip into a cleaning frenzy. The thought of reaching into the abyss of my cluttered and chaotic closet is a daunting one as I fear my own lack of resolve, my inability to let go of the things I no longer need or fit into.

Getting rid of clothes, for me, feels like hiking down into a clouded valley – inevitably, at some point, I get stuck, exhausted, and want to quit. But this time is different. Who I am, what defines me, how the world knows and sees me is all a bit of a mess right now, and I’m longing for something to hold onto. I’m looking for joy and perhaps taking back my closet is the first step.

Task - Outfits - Recesses - Closet - Life

So I plunge in, despite the daunting task ahead. I wade through outfits hidden in the recesses of the closet, and as I do, my life projects in front of me.

There are the shimmery, silky clothes that I used to wear on dates with my husband. Ah, dates. That thing we used to do so regularly before kids. When was the last time we went on a date? I can’t really remember. We have a lot of date-night-ins now after our toddler son and baby girl go to bed. But, let’s be honest, half the time I’m wearing sweatpants. I wouldn’t really call that my “sexy” look.

Violin - Case - Days - Orchestra - Practice

I reach behind my violin case, reminding me of the days I used to play in an orchestra and practice for hours, and discover crumpled soccer clothes. Did you know I used to play...
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